Blame It On The Menopause

Lately I like to blame everything on “the menopause”. I can get by with a lot more like sleeping in late, being snarky and eating chocolate whenever I want.

A couple days ago I noticed my refrigerated drinks didn’t feel or taste as cold as they usually do, but again I blamed it on the menopause and the fact that it’s been in the upper 90s for weeks now. My mathematically logical equation was – I am hot – ergo, my refrigerator doesn’t seem as cool.

Then I noticed a noxious smell when I opened the door, which led me to throw out the spinach I’d been keeping in the crisper. Later I happened to glance on the door and saw my milk had become a solid mass of something. I barely squeezed the sides of the plastic bottle when the cap popped off like an explosive nearly taking out my left eye. I literally had to duck to avoid it. Usually curdled milk is not as dangerous as a BB gun – but not in my refrigerator.

Is that butter, yogurt or sour cream?

It took almost losing an eye for me to realize I needed a new refrigerator. 

Riddle Me This

How do you tell the difference between being hot and having a hot flash, especially when it’s in the upper 90’s outside? As far as I know I’ve never had a hot flash during the winter. I’m usually freezing my bum off from October through April.

This summer it’s hot as it usually is during the summer in the South and I’m having a hard time telling when I’m having a hot flash and when I’m just hot. I can stand still and sweat rolls down my back – and my front. Once I start moving it’s even worse. I sweat through my clothes. At night when I wear cotton sleep pants and a jog bra I’m sweating even before I lie down to sleep. I keep the thermostat at 80 degrees and it runs constantly because I have a 100+ year old home and trying to cool it is like trying to cool a stadium with a box fan.

My mother and I were having a conversation about life before air conditioning when she said, “I don’t think it used to get this hot.” And I said, “Yes it did. Remember when we finally got an air conditioner in the house and it had to be 90 degrees outside before you’d turn it on?” “Oh yeah, I guess we were just more used to it then.”

And not going through menopause.

Random Thought

I’ve always found it strange that younger people drive at high speeds and older people drive so slowly. You’d think it would be the other way around since older people have less time left.